


We must be killers (plotless notfic)

by Dimplesonfire



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Character building, Drugs, Elounor, No Plot/Plotless, Notfic, OT5, One Shot, POV Liam, Reality, Sex, i guess, kind of, oblivious Larry, oblivious everyone, they're in the band i mean, zayn is kinda fucked up, zerrie, ziam, zouis feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-25
Updated: 2014-07-25
Packaged: 2018-02-10 08:52:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2018817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dimplesonfire/pseuds/Dimplesonfire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam's point of vue on his bandmates, on his life, kind of, and on fanfictions ?</p>
            </blockquote>





	We must be killers (plotless notfic)

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the song We must be killers by Mikky Ekko, really good song.
> 
> I got this out of boredom at my grand parents' wifiless house. I really love Zouis.
> 
> Sorry for any mistakes, typos, grammar.

It's not the first time Liam reads one of the _fictions_ the fans write about them. Some are even not that far from reality. It's usually even closer to real life than the author imagines. Liam usually keeps it to cute and short stuff, funny ones but sometimes, though, they happen to contain what the girls,  and boys, because they have boys fan too, Liam keeps forgetting that, what they call " _smut_ ".

The smut is the part of the fanfiction where the characters have sex and the author decides to describe it in details. Some of them are average, some are pretty bad, but Liam wonders how they do it because some are _really well_ written. It's usually girls who write the stories, teenage girls even, who will never know what it's like to put their dick in someone else's ass, because eh, they don't have dicks. Sometimes, the smut part is really well integrated in the story and Liam thinks they could totally charge people for reading their fictions, just like websites charge people to watch good quality porn. Because this is porn. There's no other way to say it, these girls, women sometimes probably, and guys, are writing porn and as creepy as it sounds, Liam loves that.

When a fiction is tagged " _fluff_ " or " _feels_ " or " _humour_ " but happen to contain smut, Liam tries to pretend he's grossed out, but really, he loves it. Although, maybe he might have been looking for it in the first place, since he's only reading about the boys, you know, _together_. Of course he's the only one he's lying to, because there's no way he's telling any of the guys that he reads gay porn fanfictions about them. One of the relationship he likes to read about is Ziall. Because it doesn't contain anything about himself and also because it's fun to read about Niall being gay. It's fun because Niall is the least homosexual person he's ever met. Not that Niall is homophobic, far from that, after all, he lets Harry sloppy snog him him when he's drunk, but it's because Harry sloppy snogs everyone when he's drunk. No Niall is just, well Niall.

They don't lie when in interviews they say he's the most carefree person they know. Besides Niall has Maya. M

aya is his two years girlfriend. Maya is also deaf. When Niall introduced her to them, they were all a little surprised, honestly. Then very embarrassed they ever were. Maya is short, 5.1 maybe. She's not skinny, without being obese, but she's curvy. She has hazelnut hair and eyes. Niall is madly in love with her and she is with him. It's a total cliché how they met. She kind of saved him once, in Italy. 

Niall was sick of being stuck in the hotel, so he had snuck out by himself. Of course Niall being Niall he had gotten recognized very quickly. Maya was walking down the same street as he was. She wasn't a fan of them, for an obvious reason, but she knew who he was. Niall had told them this story so many times, Liam knows it almost like he had been there. Anyway, Maya seeing that Niall was in a rush, trying to hide himself in the still empty street, she had given him her grocery bags and her sunglasses. Niall had been so surprised that a girl would hand him her bags instead of screaming and looking for her phone that he had taken them. She had ruffled his hair to break the quiff and brushed it to the back, then she had taken his arm under hers and made him a sign to walk with her. They had arrived in a more crowded street and Niall had seen some teenage girls frantically looking around, cellphones in hands but none of them had recognized him. Maya had lead him to her flat. She had written on a paper that she was deaf and mute and wouldn't try to sell him to the internet. Niall had helped her with the groceries and called Paul to get him back to the hotel.

During this whole time, of course everyone had noticed that Niall was missing and they were all freaking out. After that, Paul had grounded him, no party, no booze and no getting high for a month. But Niall being Niall had told him that he didn't care anymore about those shallow pleasures and they would see him grinning at his phone all the time. Three months later, after a performance in X-Factor Italy, Niall had introduced them to Maya, his girlfriend.  Sometimes, she came with them on tour, the first times she would teach them sign language but they all liked it so much, being able to talk to each other without other people even noticing that it had been very quick for them to learn. Niall was the most advanced, but Louis was pretty good at it too and surprisingly, Zayn who hadn't shown much motivation, was as well.

Maya is lovely, funny and sarcastic. Niall wants their relationship to stay private the longer possible. She still accompanies him to big events when her school schedule permits her, but not publicly as his girlfriend, like Perrie, Danielle and Eleanor do because she's the real deal, Niall says. He doesn't want her hurt in any way. 

Not that the other girls aren't supposed to be the real deal as well, but everyone remotely close to them knows Eleanor and Louis aren't really together, just like Perrie and Zayn are only fuckbuddies and definitely not ready to say yes to each other.

Far from it.

They aren't even exclusive.

They are friends though, good friends. Although, Zayn seems to only have sex with his friends and only have friends he has/had sex with. But he doesn't have that many friends, so it's okay. Nobody has to be a genius to understand that Zayn has slept with every single one of them. Even Niall. Once. Honestly who can resist Zayn ? The most regular besides Perrie is definitely Louis, though. It has happened with Liam a few times, no more, and only a couple with Harry. Which should be surprising since Harry is the only one of them being entirely gay. Or at least conscious of it. 

What they say in interviews or on stage, what they show, what they're like, is really accurate. Zayn is quiet, reserved and shy. Contradictory, he's the one who's had the most different sexual partners. Liam doesn't remember seeing him in love though. He's heard him shout it to Louis several times, when he's in the room next to theirs and he hears their bed bang against the wall with a steady rythm. He's heard him whisper it in Niall's ear when they fall asleep all tangled in the tour bus. He seen him sign it to Harry on stage, but all these times, Liam knows it wasn't _Love_ , with a big L if it really exists. Zayn loves them because they're his closest friends, his brothers. 

Zayn can be funny when he wants to, when he's had a few drinks, smoked a joint, or snorted a line. Zayn is also crazy sometimes. This is the part you can only be aware of if you spend days, weeks, with him. He has sometimes these artistic visions, producing pieces that can't be shown to their underage public. Zayn's real art is very, very, _veerryyy_ sexual.

There's this painting that Zayn gave him, a giant piece of white paper that is now rolled up, protected by plastic in Liam's attic. The painting is not a usual painting, when you look at it, fast, it's only traces, brushes of colors, but it you give it a better look, you can see that they're body prints.

They're Liam's and Zayn's body prints.

All tangled together, with sharp movements.

Liam remember when Zayn had asked him to participate to one of his projects. They were both high, Zayn had probably done it in purpose, knowing that Liam would be too shy to do it otherwise. It was the time when he was still the mature and responsible one, also the kind of stuck up one. Zayn had asked him to strip off which he had done with no questions. Zayn had spread different colors on their naked bodies and had asked him to lay down on the paper. Then he had kissed him softly. It wasn't the first time they had kissed. But it would be the first time they'd have sex, for real.

Liam remembers Zayn's hands on his body sticky with paint. He remembers Zayn's body under his mouth, tasting like sweat and paint. He remembers the dull ache of Zayn inside him, the wet heat of being inside Zayn. All that was caught on the paper, looking like a colorful mess for anyone else.

A few days later, Zayn had came to him laughing with a blue light in his hand. Together they had flattened the paper on the floor of Zayn's workshop. Zayn had switched off the normal light and and turned on the blue light. A whole other painting had appeared, making them both laugh until their stomach ached.

On Liam's birthday, Zayn had only gave him an envelope with a blank card and a tiny blue light on a key chain in it. With a wink, Zayn had told him not to worry, that he wasn't that creepy, that he also owned a invisible ink pen. Under the blue light had appeared Zayn's scratchy hand writing " _Our First Fall, to my brother and muse_ ". Of course none of the other boys had understood what it was about but to Liam it meant a lot. 

In the fics he reads, there are some where he and Zayn are together, because he really likes the Larry Stylinson ones and he's noticed that most of the Larry shippers, as they call themselves, also " _ship_ " ziam.

Just like Larry, Ziam is a mash up of Zayn's and Liam's name, and Liam thinks it's actually pretty clever. He tried to guess what they all were, those _ship names_ and it's funny because the hardest to guess are usually the ones that are the less accurate in real life.

Lirry for example.

Liam and Harry never hooked up, they're not even as close as Liam is with Zayn and Louis or Harry with Niall and Louis. Now that he thinks about it, Liam realises that everyone is really close to Louis. Come on, Nouis, Zouis and Larry are the best relationships in the band. Nouis because Niall, like, probably worships Louis a little. Zouis, because they're very similar in some ways and yeah obviously because they bang on the regular. And Larry because... you probably know why Larry is one of the most important relationship of the band.

Contrary to what a gigantic part of the fandom thinks, Harry and Louis are not together together. Like all of the boys, they did stuff, sure, kissing and couples of hand jobs, but they never committed to each other in the boyfriend kind of way.

Although there used to be a sort of connection between them during the first years of the band. Everyone else envied this connection, this relationship they had and sometimes excluded the other three boys from.

Alas, this relationship has faded away with time. They slowly started growing apart. Although it has a lot to do with their management. They haven't said it in such words, but it was obvious, and still is, that they didn't want Louis and Harry to interact so much, publicly. Apparently, neither if them had realised how close they were to each other. Maybe they freaked out. Harry wasn't out yet and Louis still isn't. It's funny though that at 22, Louis still hasn't hot the courage to face that having sex with Zayn's and not having sex with his girlfriend kind of made him homosexual. Or part homosexual at least. But Liam doesn't remember any time Louis seemed to be attracted to girls.

The Eleanor case is very fishy. She's not, as a big part of their fandom seems to think, a " _beard_ " payed by their management. She was actually really introduced to Louis by a friend of Harry's. From what Liam knows, though, Louis didn't have a crush on her, he didn't even speak about her after they first met until she sent him a text or something, a couple of weeks later. Liam remember that because he was with Louis when he received it. For whatever reason he doesn't remember, Louis was at Liam's parents's house for a few days. He remembers they how Louis would sleep in his bed. At this time, they used to fight a lot, but Louis would always come and apologise after, sneaking under Liam's blanket. They would speak for hours, Louis' arms around Liam's middle, never really looking at each other.

He also remembers that Louis spent hours on the phone with Harry. He remembers Louis taking his phone in the bathroom and staying there for a while after Liam would stop hearing his voice talking, and then coming back, flushed and loud. 

Eleanor didn't give Louis such a strong impression because when he'd got the text he had asked Liam if he knew an " _Eleonore_ " whose number he had saved on his phone. Liam doesn't recall any other time Louis mentioned her before telling them he had a girlfriend a month later. What he remembers though, it's Harry's fake smile, jokes about Louis finally getting some. Although, whenever Eleanor would come to visit them on tour, they didn't seem to be very romantic, contrasting with Louis' usual flamboyant personality. And to be honest, Liam never felt any sexual tension between them, no lust, no attraction. Soon it became obvious that Louis and Eleanor weren't a couple as 19 years old people are. They were more like this kind of parents that obviously don't love each other, probably have affairs but still stay for he kids and for the easiness of the routine, still liking each other, for the memories, the old good time. Except Louis and Eleanor were just starting to date.

It's about four months after that Louis and Zayn began to do whatever they were doing. Or when they stopped hiding it.

They never talk about it, although everyone in the crew knows about them. It's no secret that when they bunk together or go to the toilets almost at the same time, it's not for trading pokemon cards. Just like that, when Eleanor comes on tour, no one is surprised when Louis and Zayn don't show up for breakfast or if they do, it's in each other's clothes, hair messed up and stubble burn all over their skin.

However, it's also no secret that having sex is not the only thing they do together on a regular basis. It's better now, for all of them, but it used to be a bigger problem, and the cause of many fights in between the band. You know, drugs. 

Liam is not innocent, sure but Zayn and Louis did reach an alarming stage at one point of their last world tour. however the most guilty is probably Harry because he was the one bringing it at the beginning. The bad stuff, not the pot. But pills, powder, a whole pharmacy really. They were all young, barely legal, although Harry wasn't, but he had the worst frequentations. Harry was always too naive, too innocent, trusting anyone who'd make him feel like a normal teenager. Except he didn't know what it was to be a normal teenager, leaving his home at 16, still looking and feeling like a kid. None of them knew what it was like, going to college, have friends, no fans and cameras always pointed at them.

So harry befriended the wrong crowd, the one who didn't care that he was Harry, the kid with big dreams that came true too fast. They only cared about Harry Styles the popstar, loaded, famous and influent. They made him believe that what they were offering was the norm, but that to be normal he had to pay the price. Harry came back with stars in his eyes, in his brain and in his mouth. "Try Liam, come on, pull that stick out of you ass for once in a while." He'd say, shaking a tiny plastic bag in front of Liam, surrounded by the other boys, already stoned. Except that when harry realised his mistakes, he stopped, and Niall with him. Liam had always been more or less careful but wanted to be part of the Zouis gang and had kept going along with them. That didn't arrange Louis and Harry drifting away. Harry went to hide himself in his new friend's arms, no better than the old ones.

But then, after a while, Louis made a pact with Harry. Zayn's and him would loosen up a bit on the dope if he left his "friends". Harry had agreed, keeping only a few people, Nick, Alexa, Ben. Liam is certain that even though they're his friends, everyone wants a piece of Harry Styles' fame to reflect on them. Alas, that's not something you can change, very rare are the people with no interest. 

Really, Ziam, Larry, Nouis Niam, Zarry, they're all wrong, it's the five of them, brothers, friends, lovers. 

Maybe one day, after One direction breaks up, Louis and Harry will realise they were meant to be with each other, despite what they were told. Maybe Zayn will marry Perrie after all, or maybe Liam will have the balls to ask him on a date. Maybe they'll all be best men on Niall's wedding. The only one who's never been seen with a girl and yet the first one to actually say _yes_. Or maybe they'll all die on he next plane to north America. Really, who knows ?

Liam's never read a fanfiction tagged " _major character death_ " because he knows that if he did he would certainly cry. He hopes that if God or Destiny or whatever decides to kill one of them, it'll at least have the decency to kill them all, as they probably can't function without each other anymore. 

But anyway, Liam found a fanfiction and it seems good enough, it's an OT5 one, the best kind.


End file.
